\ Bag-O-Laughs
A Look In the Mirror

Age 8: Looks at herself and sees herself as Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty.

Age 15:
Looks at herself and sees herself as Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty/Cheerleader or if she is fretting: sees fat/pimples/UGLY. (Mom I can’t go to school looking like this!)

Age 20: Looks at herself and sees “too fat/too thin, too/short/too tall, too straight/too curly”- but decides she’s going anyway.

Age 30: Looks at herself and sees “too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly” but decides she doesn’t have time to fix it, so she goes anyway.

Age 40:
Looks at herself and sees “too fat/ too thin, too short/to tall too straight/too curly”- but says: “At least I’m clean” and goes anyway.

Age 50:
Looks at herself and sees “I am” and goes wherever she wants to.

Age 60: Looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can’t even see themselves in the mirror anymore. Goes out and conquers the world.

Age 70:
Looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter and ability, goes out and enjoys life.

Age 80:
Doesn’t bother to look. Just puts on a purple hat and goes out to have fun with the world.

Assorted Definitions
  1. Thief: A person who finds things before the owner loses them.
  2. Synonym: A word you use when you can’t spell the other one.
  3. Taxpayer: People who don’t have to take a civil-service test to work for the government.
  4. Admiration: Our recognition of another’s resemblance to ourselves.
  5. Budget: An attempt to live below your yearnings.
  6. Clarity: The ability to give directions without taking your hands out of your pockets.
Computer Trivia
  • What is a computer’s first sign of old age? Loss of memory.
  • What does a baby computer call his father? Data.
  • What is an astronaut’s favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar.
  • What happened when the computer fell on the floor? It slipped a disk.
  • Why was there a bug in the computer? It was looking for a byte to eat.
  • What is a computer virus? A terminal illness.
  • To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer.
  • Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
  • Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
  • My computer isn’t that nervous. It’s just a bit ANSI.