Welcome to Grant's Heavenly Top Ten. Have you ever wondered what those seats at the front of your church building are for? Want to do something daring? Maybe I can help. This time around the Heavenly Top Ten has to do with the:
Top Ten Reasons for Sitting
at the Front of the Church
- Statistics show that the front of the church building is the safest in the event of natural disaster.
- You can see if anything's caught between the preacher's teeth. Then watch him as you smile and point.
- There's still lots of padding in these seats since they're almost like new.
- You only have to comb the back of your hair and iron the back of your shirt/blouse.
- It's easier to trip the Ushers and Deacons.
- No one will hear your stomach make all those "alien" noises.
- You're the Treasurer and want to keep your eye on the collection.
- You want to justify that feeling you've always had that everyone's looking at you.
- You're mad at everyone in the church and want to make sure no one sits beside you.
- And the number one reason
for sitting at the front of the church is: - You actually love worshiping God and feeding on His Word!
The Heavenly Top Ten is intended to be a fun look at
issues of faith and fellowship. It should not be considered a serious treatment
of
any of the topics presented.